Week 2, Post-Investigation: Shinshin

[withsadness]

[He obviously, uh, made a bit of a scene there with the body announcement so maybe it's dangerous to be around him right now, but...also, they had the same friends. And Mary doesn't want to leave him alone. So, as soon as there's a good time to, she's going to go find him. She's spending most of the night inside the burned remains of Hits 'n' Giggles, but if he's not around there, she'll look around until she can find him.]

Shinshin?

[Mary'll just...approach with caution!]

Comments

[shinssin]

[ He's outside the toy store, not quite ready to enter or come to terms with today's discoveries. And who can blame him? ]

Mary...

[ Assassin remembers her crying. He was too busy taking care of the fire to comfort her — children aren't really his forte. ]

Sorry this place got burned down.

[ It's not like him to say sorry. ]

[withsadness]

Me too.

[She takes a deep breath, brushing off some ash from her sleeve. It's hard to stay talking, words feel trapped inside of her even though she knows she has so many of them.]

I saw how upset you were about Eleanor. She was your friend, too?

[shinssin]

Yeah.

[ But Eleanor's words and wishes echo in his mind, and he struggles to get the words out. ]

No, it was more than that. You, um. You know how a mom and a dad... No, you wouldn't know. [ Beat. ] Guess I wouldn't know.

[withsadness]

[No, she doesn't know. But she thinks she understands the concept, from fairy tales and other happy things that were always denied to her pretty, framed existence.]

You loved her?

[shinssin]

... Yeah.

I did.

You know, it's funny. In the book I'm from, they said I was a romantic. [ He lets out something like a laugh. ] But I never did end up with anyone.

They never did write that ending for me.

[withsadness]

Nobody should have to be alone.

[Mary hangs her head, her hair spilling down past her shoulders at the action. Nothing about today feels right. It's like there's a big void that's just been ripped out of the space where someone that they both cared about once stood. It hasn't even been that long.]

If you were written into a book by an author, they should have given you a good ending. I'd like to read that.

[Her voice grows softer as his words hit her harder, and her thought forms on her tongue.]

Why do artists punish the the creations that they make with so much heart?

[shinssin]

[ Mary is a child. Assassin assumed that she wouldn't understand what he meant, and that she would only take them for the ramblings for an adult who's seen more than she ever has. But when she speaks, he can tell it's coming from a place far wiser, or perhaps, far broken than he imagined.

His hand reaches out to pat her head, for once. His voice is just as soft. ]

I wish I knew, Mary. I wish I knew.

[withsadness]

Me too.

[It's unexpected, coming from Shinshin. The hand on her head is so comforting. Despite the sort of energy their meetings have often had, there was always a distance. Maybe that's why it just makes her want to experience that affection even more: it's won from a shared understanding, and not just freely given due to her size or demeanor.]

I'm not Eleanor, and I can't be the way that she was, but I can love you, too, so you know that you're never ever alone for real, okay? Maybe the pinky swear that she gave to me I can give to you, too.

[shinssin]

[ That sounds just like Eleanor. She made him pinky swear once, too... He smiles at the memory. ]

Really? [ He crouches down to meet her at eye level. ] But I'm a bad man, Mary. You shouldn't be friends with bad people.

[withsadness]

I don't care if you're a bad man.

[Mary steels herself as if to try and prove it in her expression. She's serious about it! Very serious!]

If you're my friend it doesn't matter to me who or what you are or what you've done or what you're going to do. All I care about is just that you're here.

[shinssin]

That...

[ That's all he wants, really. Someone who will trust him no matter who he is or where he came from. It's unfair to expect so much from a child so small, but for a child so small, she has been so strong. A lone fictional existence, just like his. Maybe this is what she wants, too.

For once, he is the one who opens his arms. ]

Come here.

[withsadness]

[Mary's eyes widen as Assassin moves to offer her an embrace. It's the hug that's meant the most to her the second she accepts it, winding her arms around his neck and pressing her small body tightly to him. Every second of this, she'll make last.]

Don't ever leave, okay?

[shinssin]

[ He doesn't remember his name, but he remembers when he was a child, lost and alone, looking for the warmth of parents he could never see again.

He wraps Mary in the same warmth. ]

I won't.

[withsadness]

[It's the sort of warmth that she hasn't felt in...actually, she's not sure if she's ever felt it. Maybe the touch of paintbrush on a canvas, creating soft skin with each stroke of the bristles. But that's far away, barely a memory. And this is right here, so fresh she could cry. But Mary doesn't cry, not really, she just holds on tighter.]

Thank you.